The title is pretty self-explanatory. I have this cousin, who is actually more like a sister, who lived with us for 5 years while she went to college here. During those 5 years we discovered that we quite like getting into silly shenanigans when we're alone together. Add in boredom and it's the perfect storm.
We have this thing in my family where we'll randomly start talking like southern preachers. Not to mock them, mind you. It just happens to be highly entertaining for us for some reason. I blame ada. He's outrageously good at it. We also have a thing for cats. My cousin and I, that is. Not so much the rest of the family. They're not against cats (well, mostly, anyway), they just don't quite share the same appreciation and love of cats/kittens that Dewie (my cousin/sister) and I do. Anyways, Dewie and I were hanging out one night, goofing off and being silly, when the southern preacher decided to come out in us. I'm not quite sure how it came about (it all happened rather fast), but in the midst of our bellowing it out southern preacher style, we decided that it would be a good idea to baptize my cat. So we scooped her off the bed, marched to the dog dish, and proceeded to flick water over her head while continuing to yell in southern accents. Needless to say, we're pretty good at what we do. We got the other cat some time later. Converting kitties ain't no easy task, folks.
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Do you ever have one of those days that is just so wonderful that you want to share it with someone? Today was one of those days for me. I woke up feeling rested (which is surprising, because last night was awful sleep-wise), had lovely time in God's Word, it was rainy from the get go - and I'm very much a rain kind of person, and I got to spend it home alone . . . which is my favorite. Want a glimpse of my life? Here's an example of an ideal day off for me : I've really sucked at writing about life lately. So here we go : life.
I'm super pumped! Why? Because I'm taking a rather large step for myself today. I called a company to ask/talk about their processing procedures with their food products to see if their products would be something my family & I can have (that's usually mums job - but not today!). I did all the research for this company and their products, I prayed about it, aaaand I'm going to try some of their stuff. Tonight. What am I trying? Dairy-free ice cream. What flavor is it? Chocolate. Guys, I haven't had chocolate in 4 (FOUR) years. I'm kind of flippin' stoked for this right now. Here's what I'm also super stoked for. I'm going into this expecting to have a reaction. Not because the company isn't thorough (I'm rather impressed by how thorough they are, and by how aware they seem to be. Like, really, really impressed), but because of how sensitive I am because of the damage that was done, and a slightly cynical outlook because of not being able to have such things for so long, it's just sort of what I'm expecting. However, if I do have a reaction, it would be low-level, because of how thorough the company is. Why am I stoked for this than? For once, when it comes to food, I'm willing to go for it and take a chance - even with the mindset that I'll have a reaction. It may not seem like much, but this is a huge deal for me and all my little fear issues that I've been working on. Reactions terrify me. How they make me feel, and what they do to me . . . it's just no bueno. BUT, I'm oozing joy right now for the fact that God has taken my fearful, stubborn little heart, and has softened it and strengthened it with trust enough to do this. Plus . . . I GET CHOCOLATE! Maybe for the last time. Idk. Just another wee little step forward on this crazy journey that God has me on. To quote What About Bob?, "Baby steps. Baby steps. Baby steps through the office. . . Baby steps out the door. . . It works. All I have to do is take one little baby step at a time, and I can do anything." Baby steps, people, baby steps. Thank you, Lord, for your ridiculous amount of patience. And chocolate! Thank you for the opportunity to eat chocolate again. So, I've had a lot of fear in my life. Some irrational, some rational. One of my biggest fears when I was little was the toilet. But this toilet terror was not irrational, oh no. You see, I was a rather tiny child. I'm still rather tiny now, but it was even more so when I was little. When I was 9, I weighed 40 pounds and people thought I was 4. Now imagine me when I was around kindergarten age. Yeah, I was tiny. What does my being so tiny have to do with my awful fear of toilets? Well, being so tiny made it a lot easier to fall in. And that's what happened. To quote my mum, "It swallowed you up, which is what you were afraid of".
See? Completely rational fear of toilets. Also, my friends older brother at the time had a little plastic toy toilet that transformed into a scary face, where the bowl was the mouth. So that didn't help things at all. It all sounds rather funny, but in all seriousness, I really was terrified of our toilet. It was bad. Luckily, my father is brilliant, and had the wonderful idea of taking me to the toilet section of the hardware store, where he and one of the workers showed me the different sections of a toilet, how the pipes are far too small for me to ever fit through, and had me put my hand through one of the disassembled toilets to prove it. And there you have it. Toilet terror = cured. I still fell in, but it wasn't nearly as traumatic as it was before. Hiccups.
We all get them.. There are several different ways that are said to get rid of them : Holding your breath, drinking water, getting startled, or, apparently, pulling on your tongue are amongst a few of the most popular ways. I personally hold my breath and take 10 swigs of water, but that's not what this is about. Whenever someone else has the hiccups, it seems to be human nature to try and scare them out of them, usually by yelling in their face abruptly or pretending to push them out of a window or something. Kinda like "the kick" in Inception. Though let's be real, that doesn't usually work. The yelling part at least. I decided to try a different approach to this. About 2 years ago or so, mum and I were in her room, winding down from the day. She was sitting in her chair, and I laying on their bed next to her. Before I go on, you should know that hiccups are a bit of a thing in our family. My mums are rather loud, and mine . . . are well known. I come by it honestly. Anyways, she was having somewhat of a hiccup fit, so I, out of human nature, jolted loudly & suddenly towards her. Nothing. So I took a different approach. "Mum, I'm pregnant." There was silence - no hiccups to be heard. Was my mum actually scared that I was pregnant? No, she knows me far better than that. Did the thought of me being pregnant startle her? I'll let you can be the judge of that. I heard someone say last Tuesday that "hope is a life free of disappointment". And I was like, "well that's stupid . . ." I've been learning a lot about hope recently. Up until a smashing conversation with a bro of mine, I seemed to have pictured hope as more of wishful thinking. "Hope" and "wish" were interchangeable. But apparently that's not it. Hope is an expectation. Google's definition puts it this way : "A feeling of expectation and desire for a certain thing to happen". That being fresh on my mind, when I heard "hope is a life free of disappointment" I laughed because that's not how my brain works. Growing up I've developed a habit of not letting myself become excited for a lot of things, because in my experience, they don't usually happen : people flake out, they forget about you, they find something that sounds better, or circumstances just don't work out. I was tired of getting disappointed and hurt, so I just didn't allow much room for excitement until I knew that it would actually happen. I realized this last December. My sister, bro-in-law, and I were going to see The Hobbit. I was stupid excited for this because, well, it's The Hobbit. I've seen the LOTR trilogy beyond 50 times (extended edition, keep in mind), and I was well ready to watch more LOTR that I hadn't seen before. For whatever reason, I broke that habit for a night and was stupidly gitty excited. When we got there, it was sold out. I was majorly disappointed. But not so much that it was sold out, we decided to just watch it the next day or 2 instead. I was more disappointed that I allowed myself to become hopeful and excited about something before it happened. I felt incredibly foolish and let down, and I remember saying to my mum, "That's why I don't usually let myself get excited about something - because it usually doesn't work out and then there's all sorts of disappointment". Let's pause for a moment and realize how incredibly angsty I sounded. I didn't realize that until I typed it out. My apologies, people. Anyways, that's when God kinda revealed to me that pattern that I had developed. Which, let's be real, really isn't all that healthy. Then this whole subject of hope arose in my life, coming from various different places. Then God was like, "I'm going to give you a situation to have hope in so that you can grow in it". And that's why I'm writing this. Last week I went in to get Xrays on my legs to see if they were different lengths. If this was the case, then all that would be needed was an insert for one of my shoes to even them out, and some time & work to get them stable again - then I would be able to run, and hop, and skip, and jog, and exercise, and possibly even DANCE again. A little context for those who don't know about this aspect of my life: Due to an extremely easily misaligned pelvis, sacrum, and hips, accompanied with a twisted spine (and bad knees), I'm unable to do most physically active activities. Ballroom dancing and West Coast Swing are pretty much the only exception, and it's kinda pushing it at times. And admittedly, I'm not always that good about not doing things that I'm not supposed to do. Sometimes I like dancing around goofily in my kitchen - not hard - but it usually ends up in pain. What happens is that I'm pretty much always misaligned skeletally, but when I do those things, something gets stuck and it causes nerve pain to radiate through my lower back and down my legs. That happens by sleeping, let alone physical activity. Anyways. I was really excited about this, and God had softened my heart to allow myself to be excited about it. And for the first time in years, I had hope that I would be able to do physically active things again. I never thought I would be able to. I knew that it wasn't a 'for sure' that's what's happening, and that there was a chance of that not being the case and I would continue to live a non-physically active life, but I still chose to have hope in the situation - real hope. Not just wishful hope. With that God reminded me that even if He doesn't heal me physically now, or even while I'm breathing, He WILL restore me. He has promised me healing and restoration, I just don't know if it'll come on earth, or if I simply must wait 'til heaven. But either way, it's coming. It's gonna happen, peeps. "Hope is an extension of trust. Trust that God has a plan for your life; a plan full of His goodness & grace" So back to this whole "hope is a life free of disappointment". My hope had already been founded in Christ with salvation, but could I put my hope in Him when it comes to physical healing? Sounds silly because it's terribly small in comparison, but isn't that what we do so much of the time? Trust God with the really big stuff but try to take care of the smaller stuff cause that's something we feel like we can control? I feel like it happens a lot, for me at least. That's another thing He's been working on in me. ANYWAY. I decided to really put my hope in Him when it came to physical healing. And I got my Xray results back today (finally). My legs are even. It's not a simple fix - there's no sign of being physically active in the near future. "Hope is a life free of disappointment" How does that even make sense? Albeit, I took it quite calmly, I was disappointed at first. But then I realized I wasn't. I was excited. What? I was sad that I still wouldn't be able to do all those things that I so often dream about doing, but not disappointed. I got excited because God reminded me of the beautiful plan He has for me in my physically sedentary state. And even though there are definitely tears happening right now, and I have no idea what those plans may be, I'm looking forward to seeing what He has in store. I know it's a far better plan that what I can think up, and I trust Him in that. And I'm still holding on to that hope of His promise to heal me, whenever it may be. This is a song that is very dear to my heart. It's one of those songs that you can sincerely sing every line and mean each one. 'Tis one of my life songs. It's also one of the only songs that can evoke some sort of deep emotion from me other than crazy. "And we know that God causes everything to work together for the good of those who love God and are called according to His purpose for them."
Romans 8:28 Oh, Frank... August, 2007.
The biennial High School Mexico Mission Trip that our church had. I was finally old enough to join in on this adventure. I won't tell you about the whole experience, because as good as it all was, I don't feel like/have time to type all of that out for you right now. So I'll just tell you about Frank. Frank was our tent while we were there. A 4-person tent that we squeezed 6 girls and their luggage into. Why am I telling you about our tent? And why did we name it Frank? This was a very memorable tent for me. We named it Frank because it's short for Frankenstein - he was just falling apart more & more every day. It taught me some valuable lessons. Such as : duct tape CANNOT fix everything. It also taught me how to find true comfort in Christ, as the door right beside my bed's zipper broke one the second night - right after a tarantula had been spotted by the bathrooms by our camp. Cool beans. I don't do big spiders. Especially when there's the strong possibility that one could be crawling into bed with me in the middle of the night and take refuge in my blankies that I bury my face in. No bueno, bro. Not only was the door right beside my bed broken, but so were two of the three windows, and one of the other doors. Safety pins and duct tape can only do so much . . . My trust and security in Christ grew TONS during that trip. As did my faith. A good portion of that came from Frank. I like the random ways that God does teaches us things . . . ...to defeat the Huns! HU! I diverged from my original intent of this blog. It somehow got established in my mind that my posts should have some sort of great message to it, or sound just smashing. And while that does happen, that's not real life - which is what it's supposed to be about. I'm striving for growth, not perfection. This is what happens when a simple person tries to make each post as eloquent as possible. Let's remember who we're talking about here. I'm the person who put cheese grease on her lips, whilst eating grilled cheese sandwiches, to substitute for lip gloss. The same person who, still, uses Febreze as a fragrance. There's not much eloquence to me. Though I have my moments of epiphanies, and I greatly enjoy writing them out, I'm kinda tired of waiting for them in order to write. So, with that being said, here's a post about nothing really important.
Dick Grayson will forever be the best Robin in my eyes. As you probably figured out from above, I'm not a very classy person. I've become addicted to instagram because I just figured out last week the function of hashtags. I ate my hot dogs with mustard, ketchup, and onions ( and sometimes relish), and chilli dogs made me very, very happy. I belong in a boyband, mainly because of my dancing. When I snap in my seatbelt belt buckle after peeing, I feel like a superhero suiting up - but only in public bathrooms. I've only had cheesecake once and it was homemade and not very good. I'm writing most of this at 1:48am because I'm a night owl, I have sleep apnea, and the two combined = I can't sleep. There are 1990's Batman baby quilts on my bed, none of which I grew up with; I bought them 2 years ago, when I was 18. My right hip/pelvis/leg/back hurts right now. I don't feel like listing pointless things anymore. And there you have it, a blog post to break the streak of pointfilled blog posts. Yay! Good. Now that that's done, I want carrot cake and milk. Every Tuesday night, that's what I did. Babysit. I got to do so for the Single Moms bible study at our church, with a good friend. Every Tuesday night we would choose a kids movie (which we would always enjoy more than the kids), play with trains, build forts, play with cars, color, and watch the kids too. Did I mention we got paid to do so? Yeah, it was a pretty sweet setup. I also got some little boyfriends out of the deal. That's what my dad always called them at least. I don't know how many years I did this, but there have been three little boys during that time that really connected with me. The first one was super shy and wouldn't be happy with anyone else. Then he grew up and moved on (so sad). Then my little buddy (we'll call him "J") came, and we're still pretty tight. One of
Another wonderful thing that we got to do was play dress-up. Before the kids came, or after they had all left, we would see if we could squeeze into the toddler costumes they had in the room that we babysat in. My personal favorites are pictured below - the Buzz Lightyear costume (which was a little boys size Small or Medium) and the Optimus Prime (also Small or Medium) one. Keep in mind, these are both one pieces. Yeah. Mad skillz up in here. Gotta love babysitting.
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